Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in steve's LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, January 20th, 2004
5:05 pm	I am a UF Alumni Well for those of you who don't know, I finally graduated from UF in December. It was pretty cool because if you graduate while you are still mascotting you get to wear the Albert hands and feet when you walk onstage. My friend Ryan graduated with me so we both got to wear them, it was good times. Now I am unemployed. I am waiting to hear back from Microsoft about getting my interviews set up and so I am hanging out in Gainesville writing music, chillin out, and just enjoying life. My band, Oxford Comma, totally rocks and I can only dream about being able to make a living off of that someday. But for now I wait... call me ;) (Comment on this)
Friday, July 11th, 2003
2:31 pm	drunk Jeff The people I am with: one girl who I met about 2 months ago one guy who I met once 3 weeks ago one girl who I've never met Jeff, who I met once 3 weeks ago They are all good friends. So it's the 4th of July. Everyone barbeques all day and also drinks beer all day... especially Jeff. So Jeff comes over to the bbq around 4 or so and starts drinking, like everyone else had been doing since about noon. In an effort to catch up, Jeff pounds the beers back and tops it off with plenty of shots. Hours of drinking later, we leave for the fireworks which are in a huge park (tens of thousands of people there). Jeff sits shotgun in the cab and is silent until we are about half way there. All of the sudden he says, "you guys ready to go?" Mind you, we are in a cab and driving and Jeff thinks we should go. I say, "what?" Jeff then burps and hiccups simultaneously and is then silent the rest of the trip. So we get out of the cab and still have to walk several blocks to the park. Jeff has to pee. With hundreds of people around, he walks into the bushes (still in plain site of EVERYONE) and starts pissing. We pay no attention to him and just keeping walking. One of the girls glances back just in time to see Jeff zip up and turn and start walking the wrong way! Thinking we're actually better off without him we just keep going. We make it into the park and find a spot to sit. Now this park is HUGE, but as soon as we sit down, we look over, and Jeff is standing 5 feet away from us, by himself. Weird. So we bring him over to us and watch the fireworks. After the fireworks we are leaving the park. Just as we get outside the park we see this girl sitting on the curb balling her eyes out. Jeff, being the concerned drunk, sits down next to her and starts talking to her. He finds out that she was supposed to be meeting her bf and he got mad at her and ditched her or something like that. So we think this is sad and all but we are trying to get home. Jeff was having no part of us going home and stated that he was gonna stay with this girl. His friends figured there was no reasoning with him and decided we should go. This is quite funny to me but whatever. So we start walking home although we are not sure which way we should actually be going. We walk a random number of streets in one direction and at some point decide that we should walk a few blocks up and continue in that direction. We make a turn, walk 2 blocks, make another turn and keep walking. Moments later I look to the other side of the street only to see Jeff leaned over outside of somebody's house. Ok this wigged me out. Again, his friends weren't that shocked. We yell at him and he motions to give him a minute. He then walks up to the front of this house where there are people sitting out and drinking beer and introduces himself and asks to use their bathroom. They agree and he goes inside. About 10 minutes later, we are still across the street waiting on Jeff when the door opens and I see Jeff inside drinking a beer! So we call his cell phone. This is the conversation: us: "What are you doing?" Jeff: "I'm at this house drinking beer." us: "I know, we are outside that house." Jeff: "What? Who is this?" So Jeff walks outside, sees us, walks across the street and tells us we should go inside with him. We decline (cuz the girls on the front porch were bitches). So he looks at us with a straight face and says, "do you guys mind if I go inside there and hang out?" Mind you this is where he has been for the past 15 minutes but he figures now he'll ask our permission. It turns out that the girl he stayed with led him to this house then went upstairs and locked herself in a room. Since Jeff didn't know anyone there and he was wasted they started yelling at him to leave and eventually kicked him out (as we sit and laugh at the whole thing) We finally called someone to pick us up and made it home. Good times. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 25th, 2003
11:42 pm	Sex in the Swamp So I'm hungry and I don't want to cook. Levi and I decide to go to Swamp to eat. As we're walking up to Swamp we realize that there are a ton of people outside for some sort of gathering. I immediately think that this is a Sorority/Fraternity thing and we might not be able to get in to eat. As we get closer I realize I am wrong because there are old people inside eating. So we are walking up the steps to Swamp and this girl comes running up to me and Levi. She asks us if we want to be part of their date thing and says it starts at 9:00pm. Well it was 7:40 at this point and Levi and I were planning on eating then leaving, so we tell her that. Her response was, "well whenever you finish eating just come out here and we will stop everything and do the date thing." We agree to it cuz we think this is quite bizarre and funny and decide that we must start drinking immediately. So we eat and have our fair share of beer and with a good buzz on go outside (it was actually about 9:00 at this point). So this girl gets our names and we sit down. Then they bring up this girl, 'the eligible bachelorette', and seat her facing the street. This is all happening outside at Swamp and there is a PA system set up with a mic. So she is turned around they bring us up, Levi (bachelor #3), me (bachelor #2) and some random 'big boned' guy (bachelor #1). She asks the first guy a ridiculous question, I can't remember what it was but Levi and I were laughing our asses off and being glad that she didn't ask us that. Next, she says to me, "if you were a fruit, what would you be and why?" So I respond, "I would be a banana, so you could peel me and eat me" (all this over the PA system outside of Swamp mind you). Her response to that was, "I hope you have chocolate on you." So I'm laughing, whatever, this is funny. Levi's turn, she says, "I'm not a typical dinner and a movie type of girl, what would you do to impress me?" Levi says, "first I would take you to Melting Pot, then I would bring you back to my place and put on some Frank Sinatra and slow dance with you and give you a massage." Her response, "that sounds cheezy." Totally doggin Levi. Anyway, back to #1. She tells him to dance in front of the audience to a song that she picked out and she will listen to the crowd's reaction to judge him. SO, Mr. Big Bones gets up and shakes his stuff to an uproar of noise. She is impressed. On to me, she says, "you and I have been dating for a long time and are now a couple, how do you bring up STD's and safe sex to me?" I'm like, are you kidding me? What kind of question is that? So I say, "first, I'd get you naked, then I'd tell you that you couldn't have me unless you put a condom on me and if you disagreed I would kick you to the curb." For some reason or another she responds with how much she liked that answer. Whatever. So on to Levi. She says, "we are in a cyber sex chat room, what is your screen name?" After about 2 seconds, Levi says, "Frank Sinatra!" I'm about to fall out of my seat laughing at this point. She then tells us that it was a hard decision but she has chosen bachelor #2. Serioulsy, could any more weird shit happen to one person in their whole life. For those that care, we got 2 free CiCi's Pizza buffets and 2 free games of bowling. That shit was funny. (Comment on this)
Sunday, April 7th, 2002
3:03 am	damn... ya know... why couldn't there have been a better opening? seriously, it's like going to a candy store, picking out your favorite piece and anxiously awaiting the time that you can eat it, THEN you don't have enough money to pay for it so you leave it on the counter and stare at it as you walk away and you can't do a damn thing about it... ok, I could have, but essentially I couldn't have... seriously, damn (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, March 29th, 2002
2:18 am	Tijuana... Tijuana Flats... $1 drafts... Similar Jones playing live... oh yes, oh yes... and so it goes............... (Comment on this)
Tuesday, March 26th, 2002
6:30 pm	Asdo's Birthday Saturday night our friend had a party for Asdo's 21st birthday. Got wasted. Sumo wrestled with Asdo. Watched Danielle spit on people. Told Tami that I thought she was hot about 35 times. Had 2 parenthesis (only a few will understand that). Good times indeed. Happy Birthday Asdo. Peace out der playa. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
6:19 pm	Spring Break Story... So it's the last night of the cruise and everybody on the boat has pretty much decided to get absolutely retardedly drunk... myself included. Well the drinking in the club lasted til about 4 (when the club closed) but didn't stop there. Many people ended up half naked and making out in the hot tub (names left out to be nice). Anyroad, so one girl in particular continued to drink til the wee hours of the morning and when it was time to get off the boat (about 9am the next morning) she was still wasted. And I do mean wasted! Well you have to have your passport to get off the boat cuz you have to go thru customs. As she (we will refer to the drunk girl as she) was stumbling around trying to pack she realized that a friend of hers on the boat had her passport. No big deal right, call the friend and get it. Well, the friend had already gotten off the boat. Shit. Ok, well all you really need is your license. Her response to that..."i think i lost my license in mexico, but it's ok cuz it was a really bad picture." As if this wasn't the funniest thing I had ever heard, it gets funnier. We eventually get to customs and we tell her that the customs dude is gonna ask her where she was born and to obviously tell him the U.S. Well, she walks up to the guy (still wasted mind you) and tells him that she doesn't have her passport (first offense, jail time could have followed). Luckily, like we hoped, the guy simply asks her where she was born to which she responds in a confused and what are you talking about type way... "where was i born???" Anywho, she eventually got thru but not before telling him that she has a passport but her friend had it (second offense, more jail time could have followed). Moral of the story: Drinking is fun! (Comment on this)
Monday, March 18th, 2002
10:39 pm	Spring Break Ok so Spring Break was seriously off the chain. I went on a cruise with Ryan Roberts and some others. We ended up meeting like 9 chics that were really cool so we chilled with them most of the time. It basically consisted of drunken days and nights. We were only in Key West for like 4 hours so we didn't do much there. We were in Cozumel for about 8 hours and 5 or 6 of those hours consisted of two different bars and a lot of alcohol. NUTS I TELL YOU! There were 1500 on the boat, 1100 of those were spring breakers and about 700 of those spring breakers were girls! ;) Spent a lot of money but had a hell of a good time doin it. So then Wednesday I got to fly with the basketball team to Chicago for the NCAA tournament. Missed class and it was completely excused. We got $35 a day for food and what not and they fed us steak on the plane ride up there! It was me, 6 Cheerleaders (3 guys, 3 girls) and 6 Dazzlers. Needless to say, the tripped rocked. Ok, so we lost the game. Whatever, I had fun :) And so folks, I leave you for now. And I'm spent. (Comment on this)
Saturday, February 23rd, 2002
3:08 am	elevator It's 3am and someboday is stuck in the elevator. They are ringing that damn bell like crazy. It's kinda funny actually because (knock on wood) I've never been stuck in it. Anyway... I have a lot on my mind but it seems that I can't talk about all that jazz on this journal cuz people would think I was crazy cuz these things are supposed to be funny. So for now, my emotions will be kept in. Goodnite... Live Long and Prosper. Peace out der playa. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 28th, 2001
1:23 am	i can't believe i said that... Dude... so I'm talking to the girl next door out in the hallway with Chris and I was eating a FlintStones Push Pop and her and her friend wanted one. But unfortunately I had eaten the last one. Damn, cuz I would have given them one. I always like to share. Anyway, so I told her that I had an orange popsicle and she got excited. So I was like oh do you want a popsicle and she stopped and was like oh I shouldn't. And without even thinking, I blurt out, "it's ok, they're fat free!!!" Holy cow... I'm such an idiot. I can't believe I said that. And no this girl isn't fat. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, October 25th, 2001
3:20 pm	the phone call Let me first say, for those of you who don't know, I live with Ryan Roberts. You will shortly figure out why that is important. For reasons that don't really matter, Ryan Asdourian had my Gator One. I was supposed to get it back from him during our 8:30 class that we have together but he stayed up late studying for a different class and didn't make it to our early class. So I got home and IMed him and told him I was going to take a nap but to call me when he got up so we could meet. So I wake up from my nap and Asdo had IMed me back. I strike up a conversation with my roomate Jordan and the phone rings. Now this is what I'm thinking... I got up from my nap, I hit my mouse causing my screen name on AIM to go off idle and Asdo saw it and called me... TOTALLY LOGICAL! So... knowing/thinking that it was Asdo calling I didn't even say hello but said, "hey I was just about to call you, hold on." So I proceeded to finish my conversation with Jordan and then started to talk to Asdo. I started saying something trivial and I heard him laugh. However, it was definitely the weirdest laugh I have ever heard come out of Asdo so I quickly say, "what the fuck is wrong with you? that was the weirdest laugh I've ever heard." Well this comment was followed by more laughing and a voice on the other end saying, "I don't think this is who you think it is Steve." Shocked/embarrassed out of my mind I reply laughing at how stupid I am, "MR. ROBERTS!!!! I'm so sorry. I thought you were Asdo." Followed by more embarrassed laughter as I gave the phone to Ryan. In defense of myself I must tell you that no sooner did I give the phone to Ryan than did Asdo beep in on the other line (unfortunately 2 min too late). All I have to say is that'll learn me. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 10th, 2001
12:39 am	words of wisdom Words of Wisdom for the day: Don't get wasted with people that you don't want to make an ass of yourself in front of. (Comment on this)
Sunday, September 30th, 2001
4:42 pm	translation of Sept. 15 entry (with commentary) whoa dude i drank a lot.. chris is here(I'm referring to Chris Orlandini).. he said i drank a lot.. ryan drove me home(good thing that ryan drove me home, however my car was at East Hall and when I got up the next morning to go somewhere I realized that I didn't have my car)... my sister was in the car... she was wasted... chris is here(I'm really not sure why I kept saying Chris is here, but whatever, apparently I was glad he was there, but I'm not gay). where am I(I have no clue why I said that)... I had a cigar... chris is here(man I was retarded).. he has on shorts(being Captain Obvious)... he is a pledge(no clue where this came from, he's not a pledge)... what happened. i dont know.. somebody help me(retarded incoherent rambling).. i hope my sister got home ok(being a thoughtful drunk)... i did(duh, obviously).. i hope everyone got home ok.. i did(duh again). i drank a lot of beer(as if you couldn't tell).. what shoin gbpoiahsdn(those words speak for themselves)... im tired.. im goin to bed... go away... LOL... hahahah.. chris is wasted(he wasn't wasted, I'm just dumb)... this keyboard is fucked up(I'm drunk).. my computer is drunk(I'm shit-faced).......... LOL.. haha.. i didnt even know my computer drank(I'm obliterated)... chris said not to be stupid(now he tells me)... chris grabbed a titi(?)... it was cool... im goin to bed now.. i wish you were here... but you're not... bye. (Comment on this)
Saturday, September 15th, 2001
1:41 am	holy moly whoay dude i drank alot.. chria is her.. he said i hdrakno al ot.. tyah dromnve me home... mys ister weas hi n teh care... h waswas wasterd... chris is here. whre i am im ... hak ei sgar...chris i s here.. he has on shorts... he i sa p ledate... what hpappends. i dont know.. somebody help lme.. i hope my ister sg ot home ok... i did.e .. i hope everomon eb got home ok/.. i dit. i dran ka lot of veer.. what shoin gbpoiahsdn ... im tired.. im goin to bed... go away... LOL... hahahah.. chris is werfkf d... this k3eyhg errbeorard i svuksf ceded up.. my ncom[puer is drunko.......... LOL.. hah asd.. i didnt even know my conmpyuter dranok...fd chris said not to ber hasstucpud... chris grabeed a titye... it was cool... im goint to bed tnow.. i waqih you were ghere... but your not... bye. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, August 27th, 2001
12:20 pm	don't sit next to this guy... So I'm sitting in class today in CSE A101 and this guy walks in and sits down next to me. He seemed like a normal guy from the looks of him... boy was I wrong. He began his grotesque stint by knawing on his fingernails. Not chewing, not biting, KNAWING. And with this knawing came a wonderful sound of teeth chomping and saliva swishing around... so I think you get the point here. Well apparently he ran out of fingernails to eat so he took a break and put his head (forehead and nose) flat down on his desk. This wouldn't seem too abnormal except for the fact that this guy seemed to think that his desk was a piano. Maybe he saw keys and heard music but I sure didn't. So he proceeded to play this invisible piano on his desk with his face. Ready for Act # 3? Here it comes... He sat back up (I guess the song was over) and began knawing again. Not on his fingernails though, but on his knuckles and fingers and apparently anything else he could get his teeth on. By this point I wanted to vomit all over him. And the best part was, was that he was so into eating himself that he didn't notice me staring at him like he was an alien. I'll spare you the details of the next episode and just tell you that he then decided to play the piano again... only this time with his chin. And finally, the conclusion of the worst day of class ever... After he finished another song with his chin... he caught site of his feet (he had sandles on) and apparently thought that they were dirty (his feet, not his sandles). So he started cleaning his toes with his hands, complete with buffing his toenails. *VOMIT* (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 21st, 2001
3:18 am	another nite... Let's talk about tonight... ok, I would just like to know what they teach you/inject you with at FSU that makes those mother fuckers party like they do. Seriously, we all drink our brains out and what do you know?, but the FSU'ers want to go get more beer and keep drinking. Dude, there is no end to them. I guess since we here at UF actually have to worry about school we are a little concerned with going to bed at some point during the night. But I guess... well nevermind, if I keep rambling on those Tallahasseeians will get mad at me. And I don't want that because they talk enough shit as it is..... oh wait, they can't talk shit this year, why you ask, because under Chris Rix (or however the fuck you spell that) they ain't gonna do shit against us, or anyone else in the nation for that matter. They won't even be undefeated when we play them so it won't even be a big deal. Muhahaha... well at least you guys can party. Steve (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 9th, 2001
11:54 pm	nighttime Do you spell nighttime like this or is nightime spelled like that. Or maybe just maybe night-time should be hyphenated. What do you think? I have 2 exams in the morning. I studied a lot. Do you think alot is one word or should a lot be 2 words. I know what Ryan Asdourian thinks about this. He says it's 2 words. And anyone who says otherwise is stupid. What a close-minded fellow he is. Is that how you spell closeminded or is it like this? What do you think? Ryan called me tonight to talk... come to think of it (or think at all for that matter) I don't even remember what we talked about. Why did he even call me if he wasn't gonna make a lasting impression on my mind. I know what I said, but have no clue or even recollection of words coming out of his mouth. Or should I just say noise coming out of the ear hole of the phone? What do you think? Also I would like to talk about the corrupt time system this live journal thing keeps. It posts the time that the journal entry was posted as the time that the journal entry was starting to be written. What kind of communist bastards run this website. I could be libel for saying some shit that I didn't say because I was here typing but my only alibi (however you spell that) is that at some point in time before I supposedly said the accusatory remarks I was here typing. What are they gonna do, see how fast I can type and see if it's logical that I said those things? No, of course not, because what if i took a bathroom break while I was typing or something. What are they gonna do, give me a spinal tap to remap my every move? Well don't put it past the government, they would chop off George Dubya's ear if they thought it would solve a useless problem that another country I've never heard of is dealing with. But enough of that tangent. All I really wanted to know was how you thought you should spell nighttime, or night time, or night-time. Either way it's bedtime! Wow that was really corny. I've been watching Mr. Rogers for too long. Will you be my neighbor? Oh god I'm rambling, save yourselves now. Muhahaha. Alright Ryan I know what you are thinking right now... "gosh you are dumb"... well you know what. I made you laugh. And just cuz I didn't mention anything about getting a papsmear at the library and make you spit out your drink... I'm still cute ;) Ok, about that last sentence... anyone who went with us to the Blink concert knows what I'm talking about. But to those of you who don't, you now think I'm gay. Well I'm not. Go away, shutup and stopping reading homosexual authors... AH HA... I caught you, you are still reading, that means you don't think I'm gay. BOOYAH! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
5:42 pm	my immediate plans Hello everyone. Just wanted to let you all know what I will be doing in the near future. I am leaving Gainesville very early on Sunday morning to go to Mascot Camp in Myrtle Beach, SC. I will be there until Wednesday and will be returning to Orlando on Thursday morning. I move back into the dorms on Saturday the 18th :( (now is the time where you make fun of me for living in the dorms). My new number will be 846-6980 and I always have my cell which is 215-6631. Anyway, hopefully I will have a lot of funny stories about Mascot Camp when I get back so for once maybe you will be entertained by some of my entries. Live long and prosper. Alright, disregard that, that was gay. Well come to think of it, I'm gay. Wait, no I'm not. Ah hell now I'm all confused. You tricked me into saying that. Screw you for judging me, I am who I am (Adam Sandler rip off). God I need to be more original. I am the Weakest Link, Goodbye! (Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 7th, 2001
2:52 pm	the gay guy thing... The question was why chics would willingly make out with a gay guy. These are Danny's thoughts. I would say that after hearing from Rachel you will agree that he was pretty accurate. Enjoy! DanLopez17: The reason for that is that chics want to be the one that turns the gay guy straight. "I'm so hot that even a gay guy would want to hook up w/ me." But usually, that's the reason why they FUCK gay guys. The reasons they make out are more numerous and less logical. Some do it to look cool, others to feel pretty... and yet others because they are total sluts that will just about kiss anyone. That's why sluts are called "Trysexuals..." because they will try anything. Rachel's Thoughts: as for the whole gay guy thing..... GeishaGrl99: is this hypothetical or it really happened... cause i would probably do it.. just to say i did it you know.... although i may have already (some question an old boyfriend of mine).... or you may do it to try and "change him" or maybe it is the no commitment factor and you just want to make out... (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, August 3rd, 2001
8:20 am	random thought If you got a booty call from somebody who lived on campus, it would really help if you had a parking decal... damn campus parking (1 Comment |Comment on this)